It is 2013. I am still surprised how quickly time flies amidst the goings and doings and daily tasks that are life with 4 kids. Yet this year and I am glad to start anew. 2012 was a long year. Very long. Not always in a bad way either; many of the struggles which hung on my soul like a weight last January are only a distant memory and I am very thankful for it. Bob, the kids and I just spent nearly 14 days all together as a family and we had a wonderful time. We saw some relatives I never see enough, and enjoyed every minute. He went back to work today and even though it is sad, a return to our more normal schedule is due and will benefit us all.
However, so much of 2012 was spent processing heartbreak and change and conquering the fears that overwhelm when tragedy and evil attack. I live in Colorado and I love it here; but it was a tough year for our state and nothing can change that. There were terrible fires all summer. The Aurora shooting. More fires. The election cycle--which seemed unending. Jessica Ridgeway. Several other horrendously violent crimes in our neighborhood and city during the fall. And then Sandy Hook. It didn't happen here but it hit me hard and made year end celebrating bittersweet to say the least. So I am not sad the year is over and we can begin again. I know how badly we all need it.
Last year I chose a word for my year. A word to encourage and challenge me and help me focus on moving forward rather than dwelling on struggles or sadness or the past. My word for 2012 was Healing and it was perfect. I needed to spend time allowing the Great Physician access to my deep wounds and let Him bring light and health to so many things. And He did, because He is good and loves me. I am grateful for a year to recuperate and grow new things in my life. To choose life and light and forgiveness and grace. To Heal. I needed it. And I truly feel different this year. Last January I could never have imagined looking forward with such hope and joy to what life may have in store for me. I just couldn't have envisioned a heart like this inside me. But now I have it and I need to put it to good use.
So this year I will choose a new word. Well a phrase really, because when I thought it over what kept coming up was how thankful I am for being awakened to the joy in my life. And my need for gratitude and joy in every single piece of my life. Even (especially?) the dark, difficult, painful pieces. My phrase for 2013 is GRATEFUL JOY. I hope to live in grateful joy each day regardless of circumstance, trial, or struggle. I will be thankful and seek joy. Always. And if I fail I will get up and choose it again the next minute and the next and the one after that until it is more of a habit and less of a choice. I am excited to see what this year may bring. What life, what light, what new adventures and experiences.
May your year begin with joy, love and hope.
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