What makes me mad.

It must be said that I have a quick temper. I am sad to admit that, but its true and I love truth. I work hard at controlling that temper; the life of a mother with small children often tries my patience and I handle it badly. This has created an excellent learning environment for my kids, since they get lots of practice forgiving their mother. I apologize to them a lot. Probably once a day minimum. I hope someday to not need to do that so much because it will mean I'm winning the battle against my temper.
However, even though I admit to trouble in this arena there are legitimately irritating things in this world that make me angry. I hate injustice, especially when it takes the form of exploitation of children or other innocents. I despise stupidity born of sheer laziness or selfishness. I loathe lies. Untruth in all its forms. I really hate it. And yet I lie sometimes. I am lazy and stupid and selfish sometimes. I am sure I am sometimes unjust, even though I don't mean to be so. Usually, knowing these things about myself helps me understand my reactions to the world at large and situations in my life. But today, nearly all day I was angry and I had no idea why.
And then my husband came home with take-out so I didn't have to make dinner when our cupboards are bare and our checking account is unsuited to shopping. We ate cheap chinese food for $1.50 a scoop over homemade rice and he helped me put the children to bed early so we could spend some time alone together before he left for the evening. Now I know something he(being sensitive and smart and thoughtful as is his nature) knew all along.
I am tired.
I am physically tired from waking up with a small baby and a chronically early rising toddler and being a mom. I am mentally tired because I am an introvert and my sons are not and I spend all day with them answering questions and letting them suck every ounce of energy from my soul and then answering more questions. I am emotionally tired because I am a woman and I am a feeler and things affect me and I try hard to hide it and that gets exhausting. So I am tired. This is a season of my life where fatigue is as constant as diaper changes and laundry. Sometimes I forget that somehow and then Bob reminds me. I don't think I deserve him, but I am very glad I married him.
This post rambles a bit, and I don't like that but I can't think of a way to fix it right now because I am too tired. Forgive me.